you don’t need to wake me up when september ends, i wasn’t even asleep…

…and this is the first and last time I’ll use this Green Day reference.

September is here without a warning.

When you live in the Philippines, it means one thing: start of the Christmas season. You’ll see Christmas decors almost everyfuckingwhere. You’ll hear the regular Filipino Christmas mixtape: tracklist consists of Jose Mari Chan, Mariah Carey, Filipino folk songs, some OPM singers. But mostly Jose Mari Chan. You’ll hear this mixtape everywhere–malls, the radio, your neighbor’s house blasting it ass o’clock in the morning, your own house. It’s clockwork. It’s a serious matter for most Filipinos, especially for establishments that think they’ll sell more if they put up decors early, the capitalists.

It also means the start of ‘wake me up when September ends’ jokes and memes all over the internet. I was in grade school when I first saw this, and now I’m a barely functioning almost-adult, I still see these jokes. Set a freaking alarm, people. Seriously. Even Green Day’s so sick of that joke.

But we digress. If you’re me, it’s your favorite month. Yup, my favorite month.

I like September (now more than ever) for a multitude of reasons–birthdays of the two of my most favorite Korean boys ever, BTS’ comeback, Hermione Granger’s birthday, BBC Radio 1’s Live Lounge Month, cousins’ birthdays, my favorite aunt’s birthday, my birthday.

September also freaks me out because it’s my birth month. I grow old every September. I turn twenty-one this year, on the fifteenth. And I still haven’t figured out what I want to do in life. As in a concrete plan. Like a five year plan of action. Maybe some will say that “you’re still young, you still have enough time to figure it all out”. But really, how enough is ‘enough time’?

I really don’t want to be complacent because time flies by so fast, especially when we’re not looking. I turn 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26…until I realize I’m too old and I haven’t really figured out what I want out of this…this I call my existence, and what this existence wants out of me. I don’t know. Ugh. I don’t know anything. Maybe I’ll grow too old and still won’t know all those things. Maybe I should be content with whatever knowledge and whatnot I pick up along the way.

Anyway, it’s September 2nd in my time zone already (see what I mean with time flying by fast!?). I should sleep. I still have letters to deliver, pictures to take later in the day.

I made a Spotify playlist for this, hell if I know why, but here it is:

Bye. Talk soon.

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